Friday, August 11, 2006

it seems almost ironic that agape love could blend in with dissatisfaction.

wasnt really angry. just really disappointed when i read it la.

anyway. that aside. small matter. i shall really thank the Lord for wad He did for me today.

its like when i woke up, just had this very lousy feeling. den its like i didnt do my project work, didnt do my econs, had to drag myself thru chinese, had a cold war with my mom that was beginning to escalate.

den its like i was thinking on the way to school. God wheres my purpose. what would You have me do in pjc. is it even the place i should be? so on that train i just prayed, and when i did that, i just felt the presence, the peace of God that flowed and flowed and everything just felt so calm at that moment.

den i was about to think that hey God, i guess everythings gonna be alright, but the second i said amen, my fone rang, i was thinking, thats nice, maybe someone gonna wish me good morning and say something nice. but nope, was my mom hu gave me a sequel of last nights nonsense, but i decided to listen to John, and i didnt at all raise my voice. heh. den when i was on the bus to school, i was thinking, God, help me leh. den i just prayed again, and i was like God, i know me and mum have had loads of problems, but i pray u ll make it alright again, forgive me for all the negative emotions i ve had about her. loose the spirit of bitterness, loose the spirit of anger, loose the spirit of resentment, and with that in mind, met julie at the traffic light den went to school.

and God to my utmost amazement, i was like thinking, die, my group is gonna kill me for not doing my PW, but den one member didnt come, one member came late, plus loads of people in class didnt do it, so no one handed in today la. den was the econs, its like my teacher didnt mind and for once, i listened in class and understood every word she said. amen! and cus of my argument, i didnt ask my mom to write me a letter to excuse my signing out from school on monday, so i was thinking, die die die, madam lim sure kill me one, she ll like send me to the dm or tell my council teachers for sure, but den i told her the truth, and she simply told me to hand up my letter on monday. my gosh! praise the Lord!

and the final problem was my mom, i was like thinking, nic tan, have fun man, gonna go home to a war zone. but den afternoon, called my mom and she spoke to me normally and rationally spoke to me, i m like so amazed la. thank you Father for turning my day around!

after school spent some time in the student centre. heh. carom is super fun, won the 2 games i played, quite tyco actually haha, remember anyhow whacking and getting in 2 black ones in 2 turns. heh. den they all went LT3 leaving me alone in the student centre so i cleared the dustbin, packed up the counter, rearranged the contents in the fridge and tidied the game closet. heh. not bad la. lol. weilin said i ll make a good husband. lol. but dun think everyone thinks that way. heh.

yup. den council stress got to me abit la. and it was really pressurizing la. i mean like, i would love to have more designs, but u people cant give me concrete designs that i can directly use, so i cant really take them, and it takes super long to do a shirt design la. i mean everyones entitled to their own opinions la. but i was quite annoyed with them. and the worst was, while they commented, they never suggested. den certain stuff didnt turn out very good. den people keep pushing me for stuff. so stressed up lo. heh. i think ikhsan rawks man. i think i do the best work for him as my openhouse ic. and really wanna thank fauz and shawn too. heh. out of the whole group, i guess u two were the only ones hu could see that i was stressed up and actually did something about it. heh. really appreciate it loads. as for shawn, heh, give the frenship a chance la, fauz has her shortcomings but if u really get to know her, shes really nice.

yups. so i just stoned, and up the point where i couldnt stress myself no more, it just went away. dimished off. and i started focusing on the promise and not the problem. thank You Father for taking me thru this day!

|cowpoo| 10:58 PM|

------